2002-07-02 @ 1:31 a.m.
Self-analysis with a hint of Vinegar

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shit, here i am agin!

iv jus re-read MY diary, and so im gonna type all about me untill i cant anymore.. then im gonna add this to my fav's script! yea!

well, one thing iv noticed, LOTS of slang! almost everytihng I type!!

Typos, sometimes there slang-induced, but still .. fergeting to end words .. like 'e' 's' 'es' 'ed' like on alot of my newer entries i fergot to put the 'ed' on fscked!

I usually give a run-down of my day, then rant .. rant about some topic usually promted during that day ... its an interesting writng style...

sometymes i get dyslexic with my typos .. adding 'e' 's' etc.. or doing that 'swwet' or 'keil' or somethin .. mixing letters wrong ... damn, its cuz im not typing, im thinking .. i put my hand son auto-pilot so that i can think faster .... i notice when i type i make quick changes cuz i typo almost every word i type, but usually i catch it n fix it...

i use similies alot, irl n when i type... like an anology iz gonna help ppl understand what iz happening in my brain .. the reflex of relating things to a more 'simple' standard... i see if i can work on that >:D

I want some feed-back!! i need feed-back! i live for feed-back!! type shit at me! ill like it no matter what!! im so fscking desparite for attention right now! i almost gave my irl friends my diary site!! they cant kno this! so fsck them!!

my evil-side is loose .. only a lil, but i kno its present .. i can feel this un-caring wanton force beckoning at the back of my mind .. all my power and strenght are derived from evil .. why is that? all my weakness are exposed by goodness ... I hate that!!!!! I thought it was supposed to be the other way around!! i think thats the only reason iv bein able to deal with this week .. that internal fuel, like a lil evil fire that warms me, comforts me ... i dont like being comforted by evil... that really sucks... but i kno if i start thinking purely agin then ill lose it for good ... everything i care about is wilting away .. slowing drifting out of my life.. in 2 years, all i kno and love is gone .. i need new friends, but theres none to be found? this really sucks.

the deja-vu is prolly lacey-zeke induced .. oh by the way.. i ate 4 bites of burrito n 3 cookies today ... i hate that. its the same thing agin, im really nervious, and so nothing i want to eat looks eat-able... and i dont really feel hungry ... i need to relax, i need my lacey-fix!!

oh jaclyn sucks ... ic thought about that, both her n david are nuts, theyre jus not coolies at all... prolly karma of some kind goin on there... i think she might be one'a those chicks Zeke wanted.. ill havta re-read his one day..

everyone whos read the diary seems to hav gotten really distant from me ... Oh god, plz dont let jordan view laceys profile.. then he'll get to my site!!!!!!! fuck!!!!!!!!!

Gem was fun, but i think shes scared of me.. that sux .. she read the diary i assume..

and finally.. I NEED MONEY! it seems to be the main drive of my existance! i dont not move, except for money and lacey ... wtf iz up wit that ... and the money iz only to impress lacey anywayz ...

i need sleep

fsck this


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!~* C'est Fini *~! - 2003-05-04
new diary... well, not yet - 2003-05-03
drunken entry... these are cool, arentthey? - 2003-05-03
random entry ~ jills fault... **and then later this becomes THE JILL PAGE** - 2003-05-02
Prom ~ okay, not myne but still! - 2003-05-02

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