2003-04-03 @ 11:25 p.m.
Am i losing it, or did i just not-have it to begin with?

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yeah, i kno, private entrys, locked diarys, and keeping any kind of secret usually means the begining of the end of anything good to come of me... but i dont want Lauren to worry... im constantly tempted by that knife... i dont even know where this came from?

its creepy, and i think its her fault .. i jus wanna play with it, get that jolt of energy n scaredness .... im crazy

of course, no one reads this secret-part yet.. which means if im going ot survive, im gonna havta tell someone.. hopefully that someone will be Lauren :D

meanwhile im bored, and trying so hard not to do anything ill regret...

grr

its only 11:30.. im gonna be bored till 1am .... i dunno...

-0ut

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